What It’s Like To Be Completely Doused in Gasoline
Don't worry, it was a long time ago, and I was nowhere near fire. But still. So, have you ever been doused completely in gasoline? No? Not even once? What are you doing with your life? Clearly you're missing out on one of the single greatest experiences out there.
Nah, I'm joking, it was terrible.
Here's what happened, and why I can laugh about it now. It was a few years ago, and I don't remember where we were going or why, but Husbando and I were out and about at the gas station. He was having some trouble at the pump, and asked me to help. So I walked up, all non chalant, and told him to just wait a second, I'm sure we were just waiting for the cashier approval.
"No, it's not working, I'm going to have to move to a different pump......"
And then he removes it. And the gas goes all over my shirt, pants, and shoes.
I just looked at him in complete and utter disbelief. I think I might have gasped or something. I was just SHOCKED. If we were going somewhere, we sure weren't after that. I waddled my way back to the car and tried to ignore the cashier who must have been dying of laughter. I sat there, and it was kind of burning my skin a little bit. But it was tolerable. We went home, the clothes immediately got into the wash, and I took about four showers until I couldn't smell it anymore.
The clothes, though, we tried to wash those several times. We used regular detergent, Borax, everything. We washed those clothes probably about ten to fifteen times, nothing. It still smelled like gasoline. So we had to go ahead and bag them up and throw them out. It sucked, because those were my favorite sneakers.
Now, it's become a recurring joke between me and Husbando, like the time he accidentally slammed the trunk hatch thingy on my head. Basically, he can't be trusted around me and vehicles. Really, I probably shouldn't trust him at all with vehicles, since there's some mystery scratches on the top of the roof that he "has no idea" where they came from. And the front bumper plastic thingy that looks like he hit something and you can see the Styrofoam underneath. I guess it isn't that big a deal. Well, it kind of is, since I'm still paying on that car for about a year. The take away from this? Don't get doused in gasoline. It's not fun. But I guess that's just my opinion. I'm not here to tell you how to live your life.
So that's the story of the time I got sprayed with gasoline. Has that ever happened to you? Anything close to it? Have you had any vehicular mishaps?