I am a person who regularly has multiple bruises on my body that I have no idea how they got there. 

But then, I sleepwalk, and I bet a few come from that, or falling out of the bed. Husbando is always "checking" my arms for a few this or that and always has a good chuckle aboutit.  Why is it so easy to find joy in other people getting hurt?  It can't be because we're all EVIL at our most primal, right?  RIGHT?

We started a discussion online among friends (all anonymous, don't worry!) about the STUPIDEST ways people have injured themselves.  Here are six of the best ones from some of mine and some of Husbando's friends.

1.  "I dropped the shampoo in the shower and bent over to pick it up.  My butt cheeks touched the freezing cold shower door and I shot forward and headbutted the wall.  It hurt, and I probably should've been knocked out."

2.  "I was reading in bed, lying on my back, holding the book up . . . but I was tired and dropped the book on my face.  I needed stitches."

3.  "I pulled a groin muscle playing bowling on Nintendo Wii."

4.  "I needed three stitches when I caught my finger in the binding of my company's accident prevention plan manual."

5.  "I was in class and had a sneezing fit.  I sneezed so hard it knocked me forward so I hit my nose on the desk.  That knocked me backwards, made my chair flip over, and I hit my head on the floor.  I was unconscious and bleeding."

6.  "My friend tried to do a 'Dukes of Hazzard' slide across the hood of a car and pierced his butt cheek on a rusty windshield wiper.

So for me... once I ended up punching myself in the nose while trying to open some chips.  But then, I have also managed to punch myself in the face while drinking a bottle of water. And one time opening a pen.

DON'T JUDGE ME.

Okay, we've all done it.  We've all tried to open a plastic package of scissors and end up cutting yourself or something silly like that.  SO 'FESS UP.  As long as it wasn't something that killed somebody or permanently mauled them, we'll laugh with you.

Injuredly yours,

Behka