The Sedalia Snack Squad Takes On: The Netherlands
Yes, it's that time of the month again. No, not that - SNACK ATTACK time.
This month, the box informs me that the snacks come from the birthplace of Van Gogh.
I can't say I have too much experience when it comes to the Netherlands. That's where they wear those wooden clogs, right? That might be a stereotype. Oh wait, I know! That's where the Anne Frank house is, right? Okay, so I do know one thing about the Netherlands. Their snacks, however, will be a mystery.
Anyway, let's get to it. Less yackin, more snackin!
Autodrop Bosvruchtrode Cadillacs.
Behka:They look like little cars! They smell just like fruit snacks we have in our kitchen right now. It almost looks like the Batmobile. These are much harder than regular fruit snacks. I'm getting an almost...sangria taste. Not unpleasant. Just very chewy. Takes you a long time to get this one chewed up. I bet these are great when you have a talky or whiny kid you need to shut up.
Husbando: Mmm. Those are harder than I thought they would be. Those are really good. Oh, there's different kinds. They're like really good gummies. I like that.
Ryan: Tastes like a stale gummy bear, but with a pretty good raspberry aftertaste.
Roka Gouda Mini Cheese Crispies.
Behka: They look like little rye chips. Like the kind you get in Gardettos? I'm definitely getting cheese. I don't know if I can tell the difference between Gouda and Cheddar, but that's because I have an unsophisticated pallet. They're not too crunchy, almost just a little crispy. They're alright. Nothing to write home about.
Husbando: It tastes like Gouda on a cracker. That's pretty good. It almost tastes like Parmesan cheese that gets crispy. I couldn't eat a lot of those. They're good, though.
Ryan: Quite good! Very mild cheese flavor. Not mad at this.
Roka Cheddar and Raspberry Cheese Crispies.
Behka: I'm skeptical. I don't know if cheese and berries go together. I definitely smell cheese. Oh. That's different. That's not something I've tasted before. They're similar to the other Roka crackers in texture, but there are little almost drops of jelly on them. I was scared of this one, but it's winning me over! I could definitely eat these. Pretty good stuff! They're very more-ish, you know, when you have one, then you want another. Color me pleasantly surprised.
Husbando: This is a whole to-do. I don't care for those. *shakes head* I like cheddar, but I don't like chewy bits of gummy candy in my cheddar cheese.
Ryan: A bit "sawdusty," with no real flavor.
Droste Orange Pastilles.
Behka: Eugh. I don't know what it is about Europe, but they love to put orange in their chocolate. I went to England my sophomore year of college and they had chocolate orange everything. Smelling this is exactly what it smelled like there. I don't have high hopes. It's just orange chocolate. It has little crispy things in it, maybe some kind of orange zest or something? I guess they're not BAD, I just generally don't like orange and chocolate together that much.
Husbando: I don't know if I'm gonna like these. I know that's sacrilege. Yup. Not a fan of orange and chocolate. That tastes a lot like orange and a lot like chocolate. I'm not a fan of that flavor combination.
Ryan: Basically like it sounds. It's mildly decent orange chocolate.
Autodrop Zacht Wagens.
Behka:Oh now these are cute. They're little trucks! I don't get a smell off of them like I did the last kind, though. They've got some different colorings to them, I wonder if that means they're multi-flavored or something. They're a little softer than the last ones. Oh. What is this. It's kinda creamy... I get a little caramel, maybe? That's a little different. It was off-putting at first, but I guess it's okay. I almost taste coffee? These things are confusing. I need a drink of water.
Husbando: So the cement truck is the... luxury licorice. I like black licorice. I like this. I like the toffee one, too. That's pretty good. I like those!
Ryan: Not so good. Tastes like licorice and not so good.
Behka: Jan Hagel sounds like a name of one of the older lady background extras on The Office. These look promising! They smell like gingerbread. And peanuts. They're not as hard as I thought they would be. A nice little crunch. Yeah, it's pretty much gingerbread, I think. It doesn't overwhelm you with flavor or anything. It's fine. I guess this is one of the cookies they have with tea or something. I see biscotti on the package. That makes sense. I would have that again, but I wouldn't be, you know, anticipating it.
Husbando: J-an Hagel? Yan Hagel? Smells good. It's almost like a gingerbread. It's Really good. I like those. I like gingerbread, and they're very much like a spiced gingerbread.
Ryan: Tastes like gingerbread, with a good holiday flavor.
Behka: Okay, so now the Europeans are talking about Cuba? I guess that's a thing. These smell a little spicy. I guess they're supposed to be triangle shaped, but most of them are broken. I would not call these spicy. There are peppers on the bag, but it's not spicy. It's nice, though! I don't know if I'd call it Cuban, but it's nice. It's a little salty, but not too much. I could sit on the couch and watch tv eating these. I guess I am getting a little bit of the pepper flavor, but not any heat. I like these.
Husbando: This has the potential to be delicious, or terrible. I do like paprika. These are mine. *closes eyes* It reminds me of something, I'm trying to think of what it is. There's a cereal that has the same kind of consistency as this. Corn Puffs cereal. Those are good. I like those.
Ryan: Onion flavor. I think this tastes exactly like Funyuns.
Behka: I don't know who Max and Alex are, but apparently they're Holland's finest. Chocolate and caramel on shortbread, looks like. Yep, that's exactly what that is. The caramel is a little different, it's a little sweeter. Nothing really jumps out at me on this one. It's just shortbread. Nothing remarkable. If that's Holland's finest, Holland is kind boring. No offense, Max and Alex. I'm sure you're great kids.
Husbando: *puts the whole thing in his mouth* Just tastes like chocolate. It's good chocolate, but.. it doesn't taste like what I think of when I think of Stroopwafels.
Ryan: Pretty standard flavor. Nothing overbearing about it.
Behka: I always dread when we get to the candies part. These are almost always nasty. I'll try to go in with an open mind. I like milk, after all. It broke apart instantly! It smells like white chocolate. OH GOD. That's so hard. Well, now that I'm chewing on it a little, it's softening up. Yeah... that tastes like white chocolate milk. In a Tootsie Roll form. It's
Husbando: Is this just, like, condensed milk? It just tastes like sugar. It doesn't taste like milk. It's like toffee. Or caramel, not toffee.
Ryan: Like a semi-sweet tootsie roll.
Napolean Zwart Wit.
Behka: Hard candy. Eugggh. Oh sweet baby jesus, what have I done. This is... is like black licorice. Oh, and now it's salty. No. I will not do this to myself. I'm not finishing that. That goes right in the trash, where it BELONGS. I need to gargle. Or maybe just cut my tongue out. Whichever makes this taste go away quicker. NO. BAD NETHERLANDS. You go sit in the corner and think about what you've done!
Husbando: *Strange face* Uh huh. No. It tastes like ammonia. It tastes like cat pee. Eugh. It's all up in my nose! EUGH. *Cough* I love black licorice, that doesn't taste like black licorice that tastes like cat pee. That's terrible. I really wanted it to be black licorice.
Ryan: ...........This was awful.
Behka: Oh no, more hard candy. Actually, it's okay. It tastes like... coffee. Like coffee that's been slightly burned. Or maybe espresso? The piece is too big for my mouth. I have half a mind to spit this out, and half a mind to keep it going. Nah, I'm going with the spit it out option. Not because it's so terrible, but because it's just going to take forever to eat it.
Husbando: I like this. But I'm a coffee fan. Oh, man. This is good. This is really good. I like that.
Ryan: Not very flavorful, but there is a very subtle root beer taste to this candy.
Dutch Best Pralines.
Behka: So this says Hazelnuts, but it also says Pralines. Are they the same? One just says Hazelnuts, the other one says Crispy Hazelnuts. I'll take the Crispy one. It smells like a....Whopper. Yeah, like those little malted milk balls. Yeah, it's kinda like that. Only it has a soft center. I'm guessing that's hazelnut spread or Nutella or something. Yeah, it has the mouth feel of a chocolatier Whopper, only it has stuff in the middle. I'm not mad at that. It's a little much for one bite, though.
Husbando: Hmmm. It's a Lindt truffle. That was good. I like that. I don't have anything else to say about that. It's good chocolate.
Ryan: I completely forgot about this one and didn't try it.
Behka: Overall, not an unpleasant box. It wasn't as crazy as some of the others. There weren't any big stand out moments that I thought were funny or crazy or just completely out of the box. Generally, they seem to know what they like and just make seven kinds of it. Overall, my favorite was the Chio Pinchacha. I'd eat those again. I'd give an honorary mention to the Roka Cheddar and Raspberry. Least favorite was the Napoleon. We need not speak of that again. Wierdest was the Zacht Wagens, because they just changed flavors.
Husbando: The Chio Pinchacha is my favorite thing. The cat pee thing was my least favorite. The Roka Cheddar and Raspberry was the weirdest. Overall, this was pretty good. For the most part it's good. It's not the best one we've had, but it's not the worst one we've had.
Ryan: Overall, I thought the best one was Roka Gouda Mini Cheese Crispies. The weirdest one was probably the Holland Hopjes, still not sure what to make of this one.
The worst one was definitely the Napoleon Zwart Wit. I don't think Napoleon himself would eat this. This was one of the better months for Snack Squad. A lot of the offerings this month were fairly "normal" (at least for my American pallet). Overall score: 8/10
Well, that's it for this month's Snack Squad. They changed up the booklet, so it doesn't look like there's a clue for next time. We'll just have to live in suspense until then!