Drew Weisholtz is an award-winning writer who has had his work published on several websites, including GuySpeed, StarCrush.com and theFW.com. Previously, he has written and served as a producer for ABC News Radio and also spent time as a stand-up comedian. He can be found rooting for his beloved Yankees and Giants and begrudgingly holds out hope his Rutgers Scarlet Knights will one day return to the NCAA Tournament. When that's not consuming him, he passes time quoting "Saved By the Bell" and making fun of his in-laws. You can follow him on Twitter.
Woman Inexplicably Gets Her Hand Stuck in Her Toilet
This woman was plum(ber) out of luck.
You Can Now Get Paid $17,000 to Stay in Bed for 2 Straight Months
Too lazy to get out of bed and look for work? Problem solved.
Career Minor Leaguer Is a Bawling Mess After Making Phillies Opening Day Roster
There's no crying in baseball. Tell that to Brock Stassi.
Enjoy These St. Patrick’s Day Facts and Figures That Will Blow Your Irish-Lovin’ Mind
If you're ready for St. Patrick's Day, you are not alone. Far from it, in fact.
You Know What Ruins a Marriage Proposal? Vomit.
If you spew chunks right after popping the question, maybe marriage isn't for you.
Fed-Up Man Quits Job in Rather Bizarre Toilet Paper Letter
This fella is ready to a-ply for different work.
Ferocious Alligator Swoops In and Steals Boy’s Catch Off His Fishing Line
You know, there's a reason people are afraid of alligators.
Whoops – Wife Accidentally Donates Husband’s Shirt With $8,000 In It, Receives True ‘Mirac…
This is the type of guy to give you the shirt off his back. He just doesn't know it.
Fortune Cookie Writer With Writer’s Block Quits, Unaware of Irony
Amazingly, this is not a headline from "The Onion."
#BadValentinesDayGifts Is Romance Done Horribly Wrong
Chocolate. Candy. Flowers. You could do better for Valentine's Day gifts, but you could also do worse. A *lot* worse.